i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
