Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Semen is not good for contacts.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
