is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize