Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.

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  (519): i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there. http://tfl.nu/mjp7
  Replies (145) Good night (4876) Bad night (1283)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.

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  (781): Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him. http://tfl.nu/iiv7
  Replies (15) Good night (8330) Bad night (1227)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?

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  (203): He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him? http://tfl.nu/bxd1
  Replies (24) Good night (1910) Bad night (5223)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.

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  (903): I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk. http://tfl.nu/07kh
  Replies (7) Good night (1283) Bad night (3468)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.

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  (917): Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea. http://tfl.nu/2kaw
  Replies (12) Good night (1901) Bad night (1088)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night

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  (609): Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night http://tfl.nu/7184
  Replies (17) Good night (5270) Bad night (1315)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.

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  (253): they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest. http://tfl.nu/yx0q
  Replies (21) Good night (3947) Bad night (827)
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  (951): View more from California

  I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.

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  (951): I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting. http://tfl.nu/326h
  Replies (6) Good night (1952) Bad night (796)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.

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  (704): Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own. http://tfl.nu/ehgs
  Replies (4) Good night (2749) Bad night (775)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.

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  (423): I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume. http://tfl.nu/wnwb
  Replies (1) Good night (639) Bad night (439)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'

  (661): View more from California

  The cougar kind?

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  (703): WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?' (661): The cougar kind? http://tfl.nu/8tir
  Replies (12) Good night (1644) Bad night (501)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.

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  (724): In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude. http://tfl.nu/8jyj
  Replies (0) Good night (797) Bad night (332)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?

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  (651): I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this? http://tfl.nu/kchb
  Replies (2) Good night (418) Bad night (360)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.

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  (817): I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church. http://tfl.nu/abmr
  Replies (1) Good night (407) Bad night (163)
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  (408): View more from California

  Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.

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  (408): Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard. http://tfl.nu/3g4r
  Replies (3) Good night (295) Bad night (117)

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