so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
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There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
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She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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