he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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