Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
