lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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