omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
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