He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
