first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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