If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize