I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
