I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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