11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
false alarm. still invincible.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
