Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I currently don't understand fingers.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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