k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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