I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You are the jesus of drinking
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
