Dual....:-)
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
