Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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