it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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