O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
