omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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