did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
