You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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