Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
