The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize