No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
