rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize