carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
