didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
