I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize