I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
this just has baby written all over it
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
