You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
