ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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