some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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