I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
