North Korea, Best Korea!
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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