do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
