Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize