How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
