matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize