I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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