i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize