i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
im six kinds of drunk right now
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
