I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
