Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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