I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
