This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
