last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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